No matter how excited you are about your wedding or confident that your partner is “the one,” you may be facing some pre-wedding jitters. That’s totally okay! It is normal to feel this way, and even to have some last minute questions pop into your mind. You are getting ready to make a huge life change, so feeling jitters is to be expected, and probably a good sign that you are thinking clearly about the decision you’re making. It’s true, “til’ death do us part” sure is a long time! So you want to be sure and completely confident as you walk down the aisle. Sometimes, nerves can point to something bigger… but more often than not, they are just a normal part of the decision making process. Today, we have 7 strategies to help you deal with pre-wedding jitters. Curious? Desperate, even? Read on!
Strategy Number One: Discern the Cause of Anxiety
This is the biggest tip, but arguably the hardest to apply. There are so many different causes of anxiety, stress, and jitters when it comes to wedding planning and pre-wedding jitters. Are you nervous about the planning process? About the dress fitting as perfectly as you’d like it to? Are you concerned about conflict between bridesmaids, or between your family and relatives all being in the same place at the same time? Perhaps you’re concerned about the weather, the venue, the food…. There are tons of things to be thinking through and worried about. So, instead of letting yourself be completely overtaken by anxiety, work hard to discern what is causing the jitters. This is crucial in being able to deal with the issue.
Once you’ve figured out the source of your stress, you can manage it strategically. Maybe your wedding planner takes over creating the rain plan, or your sister is in charge of wrangling your crazy aunt so you can enjoy the day. Remember: no wedding is perfect, but your wedding can be perfect for you. There is a difference between the two–and that’s good.
Strategy Number Two: Talk It Out
Maybe your fears are a little more abstract. It’s not unusual to balk at the weightiness of a decision like marriage. Depending on your context, maybe the title of “husband” or “wife” wasn’t modeled positively for you. Whatever it is, find someone to talk through these things with. Maybe you and your partner need to take a weekend to work through these things, by yourselves or with a counselor. Having a third party who is involved and able to provide some clarity can be super helpful. Or, maybe you and your best girlfriend or guyfriend can get together over drinks and hash things out. No matter what your strategy is, you’d be surprised at how much better you’ll feel after some venting.
Strategy Number Three: Help Yourself Out
Wedding planning is a crazy stressful time — we get it. Give yourself a little extra grace and spend a little more time on self care, if you can! It’s amazing what a good pedicure can fix. But, seriously. You may want to cut back on your technology intake and add a couple more hours of sleep into your schedule if you can. Eating healthy, breathing deeply, and integrating supplements into your dietary routine can make huge changes. For example, if you find you’re regularly battling anxiety, try taking a few CBD Gummies before heading into that appointment with the wedding planner and your mother-in-law. They’ll help you relax and focus to make the most of your time.
Strategy Number Four: Give Yourself Space to Process
We’ve said it before, and we’ll say it again: big decisions are going down. Give yourself plenty of time to process. Whether that means long walks on the beach or just time to journal out all your thoughts, giving yourself permission to feel all the feels and work through those emotions is healthy. It is not healthy to stuff feelings or fears down and ignore them, because believe us: those feelings will come back, and they’ll be back with a vengeance. Deal with them as they come, and you will be better for it.
Strategy Number Five: Set Wedding Planning Boundaries
Your whole life doesn’t have to become wedding planning–in fact, it shouldn’t. Set boundaries for times or days that you’ll think about wedding planning, and leave plenty of time for you to do other things that you love. Go on dates with your significant other, make memories with your friends and family, and enjoy the season of engagement. It is a season that will pass and you (probably) won’t get back, so live it up!
Strategy Number Six: Make a Plan
Plans can be super helpful when it comes to tackling jitters. Do you have a plan for day-of jitters? Will someone be around with a cup of coffee, or a few chocolates, or whatever your guilty pleasure may be? Do you have a plan to tackle anxiety or stress day of? Your wedding day has the potential to be one of the most special and enjoyable days of your life, and there are tons of people around you who would be happy to execute the details of the day so you don’t have to. Putting together a game plan for the day of will pay off in the long run.
Strategy Number Seven: Focus on the Future
Wedding day aside, you have a whole future with the person you love ahead of you. When in doubt, or you feel totally overwhelmed by the number of decisions you have to make, take a moment to gain perspective and remember what you’re working towards. You are getting married! To your best friend, your confidante, your partner in crime, your person… don’t let the details get in the way. The best thing you can do is to keep the main thing the main thing: you are getting ready to celebrate the union of two lives coming together forever. What a special moment and the beautiful reality that you get to participate in. When the going gets tough, don’t back away. Instead, focus on what is most important and the beautiful things you have coming.